[English Speech]Muniba Mazari: Motivational Words(11:28)

 

First of all, thank you so much for being here with us. 
I want to ask you a few questions. First of all, tell me little bit about the relationship you have with yourself. 

With myself before the accident?

Both.

So who was on social media? Who's using Facebook? Everyone.
Have you ever put your relationship status complicated? 
My relationship with myself, before I was here was so complicated. It was all about people. It was never about me. 
There was no me anywhere. You see people's pleaser.
The person who just wants to make everyone happy knowing that it's not worth it.
You just keep doing it. Keep doing it.  
And yes, your relationship eventually with yourself becomes complicated. (너무 공감되는 말..)
And then now, I don't know where there are people around me or not, but I me now, I'm more me now. 

That's so nice. What advice would you give to your younger self?

Well, I'll just make her sit next to me and very nicely, I'll tell her. 
Don't invest yourself in the wrong people. 
Because when you invest yourself in the wrong people, they break you into pieces, they torn you apart in such a way that it takes years and years to get back together. And also, I'll tell her that while you are busy making amazing plans in your life, my dear, prepare yourself for worse. Because life is so unpredictable. Just be prepared. 

One of my philosophies in life is, is that there are three steps in order to repair your life. 
First of all, is to change your personal story, then your daily rituals, and then the people, you surround yourself. 
I believe so much in these. So tell me, how important is to surround yourself with the right people?

Time is a beautiful teacher. It filters out the extras from your life, including people. 
Being in the wheelchair, in 12 years, I've had three categories of people.
Number one category is of the people who see you in the misery in pain and the backoff, they're like we are gone. 
We can't handle it. I respect them for their honesty. 
Then there is another category of the people who are not there with you, but they just want to cling on with you all the time. They're so weak, that they try to stay in your shadow. Liberate yourself from those people, because they are toxic for you. Don't let them cling on to you because they're not there to help you. Liberate them, liberate yourself,
and there is the third category. These beautiful people who are so selfless, that when they see you in pain, they stand next to you. They've got your back. They don't share the limelight. They're just there for you. These are your people value them. 
So yes, there are three categories of people try to surround yourself with those who are real, and you will feel real. 

What about jealousy?

I pity them. I pity those who see their failure in your success. 
You know, these critics, they were once dreamers. They just wanted to achieve something that today you have, but they gave up and they started becoming jealous of you. Pray for them because they're in a lot of pain.
(공감하는 한편 남일 같지 않다. 스스로의 노력과 생각의 변화가 필요하다고 뼈져리게 느끼게 된다..) 

One of the things that I see usually when I do therapy, a lot of women, they prefer to stay in a miserable relationship instead of get out. The fear of being alone is greater. So would you give some advice to these women? 

We all then to invest ourselves in relationships. And as I said, If you are doing something right, but the wrong person, nothing good will turn out, and deep inside, we were quite intuitive. We know that it's not going anywhere. It's okay to be on your own. You are stronger than you think. Don't worry about that, and wait for the right person. Let the right person come to you. There's no rush.
Are you in a good relationship with yourself? Do you love your own company? If you're miserable alone, I'm sorry, your partner will be miserable with you. (본인 스스로 건강해야 하는 이유..) So we need to understand that we need to love our own company, only then people will love to enjoy our company too. And don't rush. Wait for the right person. Because if it's meant to be, it will be. (내가 좋아하는 노래가 생각나네 Meant to Be-Bebe Rexha) 

One of the things I usually say is that your relationships reflect your self relationships. So the most important thing is to look with in fix the most important relationship that is the relationship you have with yourself. 
Muniba, I want to ask you, how do you want to be remembered? 

Such a beautiful question.
I want to be remembered as an empath. Somebody who just didn't say that I feel your pain, but I want people to see that when I say this I mean it. And as far as my life story is concerned, I don't know how my story will end. 
May be it will never end, but yes, nowhere in my text, the world will never read I gave up. (멋진 말이 너무 많아..) 

Apart from art, What kept you going in life? 

I think all sorts of art kept me going. I love music. I used to sing. 
I still sing lullabies for my son, and just like painting art music is so therapeutic. So I love music. 

I don't know if the crowd would love that. If it's okay with you, would you mind sing something for us? 
Just to listen to your voice. 

Have you watched Tangled? Tangled Rapunzel her journey how she comes out of confinement for the first time. 
She goes out and sees the world awaits her. You know what that song "I see the light" it reminds me of the times when I was bedridden, and I used to hear the kids playing outside. I couldn't see it. 
I used to hear thunderclap I couldn't see the storms. 
I used to hear the rain falling on the ground. I couldn't see it, and I missed it. 
But when I sat in the wheelchair I stepped out, went close to nature everything's changed. 
So this beautiful song I see the light. Probably something I'd like to sing. 

"All those days watching from the windows 
All those years outside looking in 
All that time never even knowing 
Just how blind I've been
Now I'm here blinking in the starlight 
Now I'm here suddenly I see 
Standing here it's oh so clear
I'm where I'm meant to be 
And at last, I see the light 
and it's like the fog has lifted 
And at last, I see the light .. the sky
is new 
And it's warm and real and bright...
And the world has somehow shifted 
All at once, everything looks different.
Now that I see you"

God bless you!

 

 

 

 

people pleaser 남의 비위를 맞추는 사람
(Someone or something which pleases 누군가 또는 어떤 것의 비위를 맞추거나 기쁘게하는 사람
/ crowd-pleaser 관객을 즐겁게 하는사람[공연])
tear 찢다, 뜯다 (tear-tore-torn)
philosophy 철학
ritual 의식 절차 
filter out 걸러 내다 
cling 붙잡다, 매달리다, 애착을 갖다 
libertate 해방시키다, 자유롭게 해주다 
selfless 이타적인, 사심 없는 
limelight 각광, 세상의 관심(여기 문장에서는 '그들은 주목받지 않지만 그저 너의 곁을 있을 뿐이다.' 정도로 해석하면 될듯)
intuitive 직감적인, 직감하는, 이해하기 쉬운
empath 공감 능력이 매우 뛰어난 사람
lullaby 자장가
therapeutic 치료상의, 긴장을 푸는데 도움이 되는 
confinement 갇힘, 얽매임 
bedridden 아파서 누워 있는
thunderclap 천둥소리